The unofficial AFC Rushden & Diamonds messageboard

Everyweeker wrote:

Sara Pascoe wrote:Justin's gone down in my estimation then. :(

Yeah this is bringing it all back.

You can make a judgement on JE based on that alone surely? Is now a time to run head first into conclusions - managers do have a job to motivate players, he couldn't have known.

Exactly, he did'nt get paid for nothing. Obviously it was bad what happened, but JE wasn't gunna be soft on him

I'm sure there are many many times JE put an arm around Dale and tried to help him out. Man management is all about sometimes giving out tough love and other times taking a softer approach... Justin definitely had his best interests at heart.

When I was a young man I was just settling into a (serious) relationship, my absolutely best friend that I have ever had was going through hell at the time when his bitch of a wife left him and took their children away with her. I KNEW what he was going through (and later in life had the same happen to me) yet he gave NO indication that he was in any way suicidal. We went out as usual to our local one night and again as usual said goodnight after the walk home. On his doorstep I said "see ya later" he replied "perhaps". I have gone over that word for over 20 years feeling guilty as that was the very last thing he said to anybody before going to Elstow lakes and putting a pipe into his car.
I cried for weeks afterwards and still think about that nights conversation on the way home trying to find out if I could have done/said anything to help him, as I know I would give my right arm to still have him around me.

All I am saying is don't blame JE as I am sure he will be having thoughts about how he may have dealt with things differently.

rudolph_hucker wrote:
All I am saying is don't blame JE as I am sure he will be having thoughts about how he may have dealt with things differently.

I agree and there may be other people, who will have been better qualified and experienced in counselling matters than Justin, and who were involved behind the scenes at RDFC at the time, who I feel will be having similar thoughts after the recent inquest.

If we could see suicides coming, there would be no suicides. To lay any blame at the door of JE is ill thought out.

I've reported on too many suicides in only 9 months in my job, no one has ever been able to say they saw it coming.

wewantourdarbyback wrote:To lay any blame at the door of JE is ill thought out.

I don't think anyone is blaming JE for Dale's sad death.

rudolph_hucker wrote:When I was a young man I was just settling into a (serious) relationship, my absolutely best friend that I have ever had was going through hell at the time when his bitch of a wife left him and took their children away with her. I KNEW what he was going through (and later in life had the same happen to me) yet he gave NO indication that he was in any way suicidal. We went out as usual to our local one night and again as usual said goodnight after the walk home. On his doorstep I said "see ya later" he replied "perhaps". I have gone over that word for over 20 years feeling guilty as that was the very last thing he said to anybody before going to Elstow lakes and putting a pipe into his car.
I cried for weeks afterwards and still think about that nights conversation on the way home trying to find out if I could have done/said anything to help him, as I know I would give my right arm to still have him around me.

All I am saying is don't blame JE as I am sure he will be having thoughts about how he may have dealt with things differently.

and you should'nt blame yourself sir

TheIncognitoKid wrote:

rudolph_hucker wrote:When I was a young man I was just settling into a (serious) relationship, my absolutely best friend that I have ever had was going through hell at the time when his bitch of a wife left him and took their children away with her. I KNEW what he was going through (and later in life had the same happen to me) yet he gave NO indication that he was in any way suicidal. We went out as usual to our local one night and again as usual said goodnight after the walk home. On his doorstep I said "see ya later" he replied "perhaps". I have gone over that word for over 20 years feeling guilty as that was the very last thing he said to anybody before going to Elstow lakes and putting a pipe into his car.
I cried for weeks afterwards and still think about that nights conversation on the way home trying to find out if I could have done/said anything to help him, as I know I would give my right arm to still have him around me.

All I am saying is don't blame JE as I am sure he will be having thoughts about how he may have dealt with things differently.

and you should'nt blame yourself sir

You have absolutely no reason to feel any guilt. No one can know what's going on in another persons head, even closest friends and family.